Am I Too Sensitive to Rejection? Understanding Rejection Sensitivity

Rejection hurts. That part’s universal.

But for some, the pain of rejection doesn’t just sting. It lingers, spirals, and shapes how they show up in relationships, at work, or even with themselves. 

If you’ve ever been told you’re “too sensitive” or found yourself replaying a small comment or perceived slight over and over again, you’re not alone. This could be signs of something deeper like rejection sensitivity.

What Is Rejection Sensitivity?

Rejection sensitivity is a heightened emotional response to the possibility or perception of rejection. It can show up as:

• Overanalyzing texts or emails

• Avoiding asking for help or initiating plans

• Assuming others are upset with you, even when there’s little evidence

• Feeling devastated or embarrassed after minor criticism

It’s not about being dramatic or needy.

It’s about a deeply embedded emotional pattern that may have formed early in life, often as a way of protecting yourself from pain. If you’ve experienced bullying, emotional neglect, microaggressions, or identity-based exclusion (particularly common among LGBTQ+ folks), you may be wired to scan for signs of rejection as a kind of emotional survival strategy.

And while it might have helped you feel safe in the past, today it may be getting in the way.

Why Does Rejection Sensitivity Happen?

From a psychological perspective, rejection sensitivity is often tied to early attachment dynamics or relational trauma. If love or connection in your early life felt inconsistent, conditional, or unpredictable, your nervous system may have learned to associate small cues like silence or feedback as signs of being unsafe or unworthy.

Rejection sensitivity might show up in subtle, but powerful narratives like, “If I let people see the real me, I’ll be rejected,” or “If I upset someone, they’ll leave.”

These beliefs can lead to a pattern of either people pleasing or withdrawing, both of which can keep you feeling disconnected, anxious, and unsure of where you stand.

The Emotional Toll of Rejection Sensitivity

Rejection sensitivity often overlaps with:

• Social anxiety: You fear judgment or disapproval, even in low-stakes interactions.

• Perfectionism: You believe you need to be flawless to be accepted.

• Low self-worth: You internalize rejection as evidence that something is wrong with you.

• Burnout: Constantly trying to avoid rejection can be exhausting.

And in some cases, the fear of rejection is so strong that people avoid intimacy altogether. It can feel safer to not try than to risk the shame of being turned away.

But avoiding rejection isn’t the same as healing it.

Therapy Can Help with Rejection Sensitivity

If you often feel like your emotions are “too much,” or that you’re walking on eggshells in relationships to avoid being hurt, therapy can help. In rejection therapy, we’ll unpack the narratives driving your sensitivity, experiment with new ways of relating, and help you move through the world with more ease and clarity.

Rejection sensitivity is not a personal flaw; it’s an emotional wound with a story. One that deserves space, care, and ultimately, relief.

If you’re ready to start therapy or want to learn more, contact me for a free consultation today. 

Dr. Wayne Bullock is a compassionate, experienced, and licensed counselor in Washington D.C. focused on the needs of gay men and the LGBTQ community. Specialties include the treatment of trauma, depression, anxiety, and sex therapy